Fighting the Injustice of Male Corporate Wears in College of Medicine, University of Ibadan

No matter how you colour it, corporate wear is a glorified school uniform. If previously you could style your T-shirt, jeans, joggers, sweatpants, hoodies, high-top shoes, and whatever else you used to boost your self-confidence whenever you went out, welcome to the nightmare world of corporate dressing in the College of Medicine, University of Ibadan (COMUI). Corporate wear in COMUI for males is as basic as the Law department's school uniform, with the difference that no colour code is imposed upon us. It consists of a shirt, a pair of trousers, and a tie. For the females, no dress code was strictly imposed. Just ensure it is sufficiently “decent” enough for your department. Does this mean that females are allowed to be as fashionable as they wish while we males are subject to this fashion injustice? Why can’t we wear a stylish tank top and shorts and look good while also relieving our bodies of the stress of trying to keep cool in this Nigerian hot sun? Why must we have to sweat on our necks because we want to wear ties? Most importantly, why can’t we have fashion to ameliorate our already good looks or average looks? Just because we are in medical school does not mean we should not look good.

Nevertheless, gentlemen, we will make do and not end up monochrome like the Law department. We will make this corporate uniform look good and excel again as we always do, even in fashion. Here are some tips to elevate this imposed corporate uniform. For beginners in this game, start with solid colours. Start with the safest combination known to man: a plain white shirt paired with a navy tie and dull-coloured trousers. Keep experimenting with different colours till you find the one that matches your skin tone. Now you just need to learn how to pair light shirts with darker ties and vice versa. Avoid overly bright colours for now. After mastering the colours, you can begin to introduce patterns into your shirts. Understand the basics of stripes: Horizontal stripes give you more width while vertical stripes give you more length. Experiment with different textures to see which makes you feel the most comfortable. Cotton is a great choice if you want to keep cool.

At this point, you are almost a master of corporate wear. You can now experiment with different patterns and colours to develop your unique style. Most importantly, ensure you get accessories like wristwatches, cuff links, tie clips, and anything to elevate your fashion game. Do not skip out on good shoes also. The most important step, and dare I say a whole game-changer, is to ask your girlfriend to style you if you can. Careful though, you do not want to attract other women with your good looks and cause friction between you and your girl. As for the single men out there, follow the steps above to improve your chances of getting a girl.

This might all be costly, but remember we are fighting an injustice. No war against injustice is ever cheap. We must prove to COMUI that we will not stand for this injustice. My men, do not let your pockets be drained by stethoscopes and other costly medical equipment. Do not let females rule the fashion world in this gender-equal world. My men, open your wallets! My men, buy cool watches! My men, set the fashion pace among all the departments in the University of Ibadan! Fight this injustice.

Olajide Olamide